Thursday, March 18, 2004

Sometimes there are so many thoughts in the mind that one can honestly believe there is not enough room for them all. Where does that unused thought energy go? Into our sleep and dream life? Perhaps.

I think alot of times that the most unhappiest, unsatisfied people in life
are the ones who think they somehow 'got cheated' out of fun and
joy and excitement. Due to an early marriage or an unexpected pregnancy, they are upset and wishing for escape...reconciliation with the past...even freedom. I think this is natural for one and all to go through at some point. I'm 27 but I'm sure that when Im 34, I'll be pissed and regretful about 'some of the things I never got to do' or something like that. I think it's only natural. Life accelerates at an uncontrollable pace. We are riders of the rails, powerlessly watching the landscapes and sunsets of life pass by.

A guy, who was about my age now, died many years back - His name was Jim Elliot and he was 26 at death. He was a missionary. Talk about a lifestyle that i want nothing to do with, but he was doing it to the full. I don't really know all of what he wrote about but someone told me a piece of his writing one day. It was this; wherever you are, be all there.

There really is no tomorrow, to a certain extent. All the planning and setting aside and saving up we can do is really not all that concrete. If you are not living for the now, then what are you living for? What am I living for? Most days, Im planning for my wedding, in my head, with sarah, before bed, etc. but alot of the time I am missing out on what is right in front of me. My job at the church - My job and influence at the concert hall.

Think on it.

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