Thursday, January 15, 2004



Why are we so guarded and prideful? Where did these traits come from? From a stinking tree in Eden where a slimy, weasel-esque snake popped his head out from, that's where. Bastard.

I think of life through the eyes of movies sometimes. But now, I'm talking good movies, so if you're thinking '10 Things I Hate About You'...you're very wrong. I'm talking about movies like 'Good Will Hunting' and 'The Shawshank Redemption'. Those are good movies. Movies about characters who go through struggles in order to learn more about who they are and why they act the way they do. Sometimes I think of God like Matt Damon's character Wil in Good Will Hunting who creates a brilliant math formula and then begins burning it in front of his struggling professor's face. Right before the professor rolls around on the floor, blowing out the half burnt equation, Matt Damon said an interesting thing about his gift in the area of math (as his character is a genius): 'I wish I didn't have to watch you fumble around and f__k it up'.

I think God probably thinks about us the same way in regards to how we live our lives. How often do we 'f' it up? Me personally, I've lost count. But here's the rub; If you don't really have any reason to believe in a personal, real and all-powerful God, who takes the blame when you f it up? You. No one else. Not your sister, Not your girlfriend, but you. I think there are way too many people carrying crap around out there who have learned, for so many years, to internalize their pain. To internalize their screw-ups and to try and 'do better' and 'make resolutions' or whatever else.

I'm gonna leave the next lead-in, on this essay for Erich and Jon to finish.

Love and Peace from the Life Giver.

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