Tuesday, February 03, 2015

The Cancellers

What is it that makes you continuously not show up or follow through? Is it me or is it you? What started this small, nagging voice inside you that told you not to stand and deliver?

I get sick of people backing out - and I know this feeling well, because I've backed out on many. After a while, the taste becomes familiar. At first, the cold, metallic shock of the flavour makes your stomach kick up a bit and churn. But after a while, you get to accept it - and you swallow.

I've often wondered if there is some sort of psychological condition attached to people who constantly make and then back out of plans. Is it real or imagined? Is steel or is it only fathomed?

The lonely roads they walk are ones I'm aware of - their inner voices tell them they are not good enough. Not smart enough. Not funny enough. But in the end, enough is only a comparative adjective that means sufficient to satisfy desire.

So what drives the desire? Where did it come from? Don't shy away. Show up in your sweatpants and messy hair.

I want you for you.

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